Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
