Dual....:-)
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
