is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
We're too hungover to prance.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize
