Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Randomize
