we're blogging at a bar
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
Randomize
