margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
