she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
