If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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