before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Randomize
