I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
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