..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
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