Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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