I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Hi. This might be awkward, but I met you on saturday at about 330 am. I have to admit I don't remember your name, what we talked about, or various details of how I got home. What I do remember is that I was invested enough in getting your number to ask my cab driver for a pen to write it down since my phone was dead. So do you want to meet, soberer, some time?
Hey bro I think you got the wrong number I'm a dude
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
