Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
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