it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
I just found a bag of teeth...
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
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