WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize