I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Randomize