but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Randomize