make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
