Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
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