these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Randomize