bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
