her vagine was all disorganized.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
Randomize
