super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
Do vagina's smell?
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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