I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize