we should wear snuggies to the strip club
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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