The brown eye won't let me do that either.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize
