hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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