"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize