did you get engaged???
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Randomize
