I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Randomize
