North Korea, Best Korea!
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
I use my feet as sexual weapons
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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