I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
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