You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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