My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
i believe in u and ur pee
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