Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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