Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
Randomize
