Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
