you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
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