well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Randomize
