I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
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