Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
