How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize