I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize