i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
