how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
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