Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Bridesmaid dress fitting. I look like a Weeble and Michelle looks like Malibu Barbie. I have to keep reminding myself that she has herpes so really, the playing field is more level than it might initially seem.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
