but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
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