do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize
