You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize
