My pussy is not your playground.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Randomize
